MCW Championship Wrestling Hallowed Ground Part II
Saturday October 15, 2011
(NOTE: This would have been published sooner, but just as I went to send it, my computer decided to have a stroke...and after getting a new computer set-up, I had to rewrite this entire review.)
Greetings, one and all! Once more, I walk among you, your spiritual leader and verbal vigilante, the one and only Reverend Rogue Six, and this is your MCW "Hallowed Ground II" wrap-up! (Beware, this is not for the faint of heart....)
The evening began with what looked like a repentant Murder Incorporated coming out to the ring. Evidently, according to Minka, they wanted to apologize to the fans for their actions as of late. But most of all, they wanted to talk to Christian Vaughn and apologize to him (perhaps in hopes of bringing the former champ back into the fold?). Christian came out, but to his credit, kept his distance. Can't say I blamed him. Minka started to say something to him, but he told her to shut her mouth; he'd been letting her talk long enough.
He'd been listening to them backstage, sounding all repentant, but he wasn't convinced; he wanted each of them to truly prove just how sorry they really were...
First on his list was "Mr. PG" Bill Martel -- and Vaughn wanted to hear him swear! Martel managed to croak out a "darnit", but oh no, that wasn't good enough for Vaughn (or the crowd). So Christian began a countdown from "three" -- and out came an "a--hole!" from Martel's mouth!
The next victim was Big Hurt, who was ordered to sing "I'm A Little Teapot", but botched it horribly (wow, big shock there).
Victim number three was Mike Hercum, who was visibly angered after Vaughn told him what he wanted from Mike; no one could tell at all until Mike said "I'm not...I'M NOT RANDY ORTON!" FINALLY! (And it wasn't even my birthday! Thank you, Christian!)
Last, but by no means least, was the leader of this lot, Minka. Christian proceeded to confess to the crowd that for the past year, he hadn't been the least bit intimate with her -- and she was to finally admit why. It took some prompting, some cajoling, one very bizarre guess from someone in the audience (here's a hint: Google "The Crying Game"), and then she finally confessed to the one thing MCW fans had been accusing her for years -- MINKA HAS HERPES!
As the crowd cheered at the dismantling of Murder Inc., Vaughn added that as far as he was concerned, the four of them were nothing but a bunch of no-good hypocrites, and he was done with them! Minka began throwing a tantrum in the ring as he walked away, adding that the next wrestler who came in the ring was getting destroyed -- and it would be all Vaughn's fault! The victim in question turned out to be Nikki Skidz, who was promptly demolished by Big Hurt within a matter of moments, and then had to suffer a post-match beating by the other members of Murder Inc.
And for what? Did it make them look any more intimidating? Did it change the fact that one man dismantled them all -- and didn't lay a finger on any of them to do it? No, it did not.
Ethan Wright faced off with MCW Elite Champion Patrick "The Ginger Warrior" Hayes in a match that was surprisingly fast-paced and active throughout. Hayes was a little distracted by a "Blame Canada" chant (which was a new one from the fans -- ah, the MCW audience, you never disappoint) and seemed to spend as much time pandering to the crowd as he did wrestling. Wright, however, was there to do one thing, and that was to beat as much as he could on Hayes. One problem seemed to plague this match, and it was the abysmally slow counts on pinfalls! Just as Wright had Hayes rolled up for a three-count, the bell rang -- and Logan Scott calls the match a TIME LIMIT DRAW?? WHAT?? Logan, old son, you need to get your hearing checked; the bell rang AFTER your count, not at the same time! I could hear it, everyone in the crowd heard it -- why not you? Calling this match was a HUGE error in judgment, and I'm calling Ethan Wright the Unofficial Winner of the match. Folks, you know me; I always call it as I see it, and this was a major-league foul-up, pure and simple. I'm only hoping there's some justice for Ethan next month, as Hayes showed some measure of courage in agreeing to a rematch.
Wilbur Whitlock and Luscious Larry Lavender continued their ongoing battle in a Pier Six brawl that ended up with Larry busted open after a dive through the ropes -- and the second screw-up of the night as referee Earl Robinson calls for a double-disqualification after failing to DQ Wilbur after he refused to break a hold after a standing five-count. . .but when Larry fights back, Earl suddenly decides to enforce the rules?
Folks, at this point, I was getting as confused as a bastard child on Father's Day, and so was everyone in the crowd! People who knew me were asking "Rev, are the refs making up the rules as they go along? didn't know. Or have they forgotten the rules all together?" I regretfully had to tell them even I didn't know. And I hate having to do that.
Earl? Logan? Any answers? And please, don't insult my intelligence by invoking "referee's discretion" -- the fans deserve a better explanation, and you guys are better then this...
After the smoke cleared, the newly-formed tag team of Justin Diaz and "T-Bone" Tony Banks pulled off the upset of the night when they defeated the MCW Tag Team Champions, the Broski Express, with an unwitting assist from Dick Jeremy (now there's irony for you, folks). It pains me to say this, but the Express wrestled a fairly legit match with a sound strategy: isolate Diaz from his side of the ring, and attack his injured wrist. It worked for quite a bit until Banks came in and cleaned house for a bit. When Banks reversed a Broski Irish whip, Dick pulled down the rope -- and out came his own man! Following that little "D'OH!" moment, Diaz scored the roll-up pin -- and we have new number one contenders for the MCW Tag belts. Now comes the question: do the Broskis have the testicular fortitude to defend the belts against this new "dream team", or will they show the world just what kind of champs they really are?
The fallout from the opening meeting of the Murder Inc. clan resurfaced as "Superstar" Bill Martel faced off with Christain Vaughn in a chop-fest that would restart anyone's heart in need of CPR...I mean, I was sitting in the crowd, and with some of those chops, MY chest hurt! Martel still hasn't learned to quit pandering to the crowd the way he does; I mean, come on Bill, you've demonstrated to the crowd that you're not as pure as you'd like them to think, just be you -- and wrestle! At one point, Martel even tried to copy Vaughn's finisher (to no effect -- remember, Bill, Thou Shalt Not Steal...). Minka decided to interfere, which got her pulled into the ring by Christian. In came Mike Hercum, who nailed Vaughn when the ref's attention was distracted; Martel rolled up Vaughn, and after the first fast count of the night, Murder Inc. stole the win! Okay, correct me where I'm wrong, but when Hercum (a wrestler) entered the ring, shouldn't there have either been a DQ on Martel -- or at least Hercum getting ejected? Once again, I'll ask the question of the MCW refs: WHAT IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT'S HOLY IS GOING ON WITH YOU?
In the Main Event, MCW Heavyweight Champion Jebediah had a fight on his hands when he faced off with the first of the "Great Eight", Justin Mane. Mane, to his credit, stood his ground against the Amish warrior, taking all of his best shots and leveling Jebediah with that incredible Pele kick of his (blows my mind whenever I see it). But Mane's lady fair, Sarah Danielle, would be a hinderance more then a source of inspiration tonight, as Dr. Dale Pierce turned his attentions towards her -- and Mane turned his attentions on them. When Mane missed with a 3rd Pele kick, Jebediah turned it into a German suplex for the win! I give Justin much respect; he wrestled a great match -- but as the old saying goes, "age and treachery will overcome youth and skill", and the good Doctor proved this maxim right.
Sweet cream on an ice cream sammich, what a night!
Until next time, as always, I am The Reverend Rogue SIx, and I'll see you at ringside!
